Today I visited a check-point in my life to re-evaluate how
much I have grown overtime by taking inventory of my life. And the reason why, is
sometimes I’m guilty of assuming I have it all figured out until I allow people
to involve me in things according to their checklist is when one situation turns
into dejavu and confrontation. But no
worries to the person who thinks they have it all figured out. Because your
choices will prove to you how we can’t resist the things we do.
The element of surprise is choosing the battles I can live
with. Which makes it personal between me and my GOD who judges.
Today I was quoted “Satan was once an Angel so be careful
who you trust. Now this is a message I’m familiar with but this individual thought
they needed to share it. Only after I refused to get further involved with what
they thought would benefit them of me too fall.
Today I made preparations to see someone tiny and precious. And what I was reminded of was why I continue to have hope in "LOVE".
Today I spoke with a child of adult age who feels the
emotions of “entitlement”. And the reason why is when this friend or child
called they were seeking the same advice without saying clearly “I continue to
transition in redundancy”.
Today I'm preparing to fly far away but I have no interest in calling upon old girl friends. And the reason why is because I recognized the good and bad intentions of another woman's mind. Because once upon a time we lived life to the fullest at a young adult age. Until our interest, bodies and minds changed about; relationships, marriage and kids, living our dreams, situations and men we either settle down or settle with. Unfortunately sometimes women place their emotions in the wrong place to accommodate the demons they refuse to face. I just decided to change my ways and company. And no matter if you're single and happy or married and forfilled everyday take a look in the mirror to say " who am I".
Today I caught a flight to check on a friend we did not how
to make love I understood his circumstance. I only wanted to see how could I
lend my shoulder and a helping hand. Remember sometimes good girls finish last. And the
reason why, some people are committed until the day they die. So if you’re a
weak minded person who thinks their strong allow situations to test what you
are made of.
Today I contacted an old friend just to check in. And again
I got no response not because we had sex this was a spiritual and heated relationship. The reason why is because as a woman I chose to babysit his bad choices in transforming from a boy to a man. Which is reality to me after I did not receive the invitation
to attend due to an “incorrect address”. So I chose to “let go and breathe” of a friendship because
eight years ago this person showed me one thing and chose some else which taught me to see things clearly. Now I’m the bad person who chose “not to
agree” with what he desired of non-logical things.
Today several people shared their secrets with me about some
else. And if this person knew what the other person was up too it probably would
or not change their minds of what they thought was a friendship or
relationship. So I chose to manipulate the words I shared and said “maybe you
should re-evaluate your relationship only to ensure you’re both growing
together in it”. And the reason why is sometimes being someone’s friend is tagged with “high expectations”.
I chose to not pick up the phone today for family and
friends. And it’s not because I don’t love them desperately. It’s because I
need some time to “compose my mind” and deal with my own reality. Before accepting
“high expectations” with limited boundaries.
Today at work I witnessed people smile and turn away snaring
and mumbling as they walked away. And if I choose to make it my business to
share with someone of what may be in their best interest. The situation would turn on me; simply
because some people live in a “Fantasy” marking me the “silent” enemy.
Today I witness people take offense for trying to discipline
their “disobedient” children. And the conclusion that I had to came too was my “child
is not perfect” in this life. And “neither or other people & kids that live in it.
Today I chose not to take a stranger or friend up on a date to
go out to eat, for drinks or to a movie. Now I’m the woman who is cheating
herself because I heard what was presented before the invitation of backrubs
and selfie picks. The game is sold every day so why should I buy into what
other people “seek savagely”.
Today I attended church. I observed the beautiful renovations
and processed the deliverance of the message while filling the passing buckets.
And immediately after church there is a
window to exit for the next service. And there could be several reason whys I
don’t focus on how religious people live their lives. I can only safeguard my
religious beliefs because people will reiterate to you whatever they want too.
Today I evaluated my obligations and decided to change a
couple of things “not making myself available” to people who choose whatever they want too.
Today I took my checkbook out to make some sense of what I
can’t keep up with. And it has nothing to do with obtaining “College Degrees” to
get an understanding of “Life, Money, People and Greed”. I made some choices in
life to try accommodating what people entertain “wanting things they don’t
necessarily need’ or just to see “what they can do to manage of how you move”.
Today I visited a check point of my life and I realize my
purpose and how personal it is for me to continue “survive”.
College
allowed me to for-fill personal accomplishments Church allows me to “fellowship”. Dating taught me that anyone can make promises it’s whether the
person decides to keep them. Family motivated
my “grind’. Money surrounded me with
friends, material things and enemies. Organizations
earned me respect. Love taught
me how to deal with my feelings. Single
parenting groomed my “strength”. Struggles
stretched my “faith” and people who I thought would remain my friends revealed to me who would leave
me in the end.
Life continues to teach me valuable lessons; learn from
yesterday. live for today and pray for tomorrow.
