In our youth we were advised; to finish high school, attend college or the military. And approaching our twenties we were encouraged to take a trade or start our own business. Why, college is not neant for everybody..
As young women we were mentored or directed in our lives by inspiring people around us. Some mentors advised to not bare children until we are married. Some mentors advised us to obtain our own wealth if not find a good career or established man. Some mentors advised us to make long term investments. Some mentors left behind family wealth that we had or no knowledge of how to manage. While some of our guidance was misdirected and down the line our children grew up in the dysfunctional environment. Mistaking love & affection for physical altercations and negative verbal communication.
As young men some were taught by the mentors to use their hands in laboring. Some mentors taught to watch the stock market, Some mentors taught to use your skillz to establish a community business, or obtain access to a fortune 500 company. More than enough mentors warned young men to think with your top head, first. The second head will cause you a life of situations. Some mentors saw the future and advised whatever journey you take, establish yourself before making a female your wife. And before you make children are obligate yourself to another mans children in his absence who chooses selected visitations. Prepare to accept not all females are wife material. Therefore if you are not prepared to take on a responsibility of another person that hides the truth regarding their situation. There is a possibility someone is going to be disappointed. Because time was lost on a good intention because of the lack of honesty and effective communication.
Looking for a mate, partner, husband or wife; until we learn ourselves how can we commit to making promises to someone else? And in doing so who says we cant get it right. Whether you are chosen or not. As a people we must figure out; what is required of growth & change in ourselves. In a life & on social media everyone is seeking to be loved if not accepted for who they are. While placing high expectations on someone else to change. So many hearts young & old are hurting. When time allowed us both to heal if not witness the red flags of issues.
We are not obligated to one another for our wants & desires. However making a commitment is determined by what we as an individual has searched of in ourselves. To be willing to make of a sacrifice for another in an investment with someone else. And no, not every sacrifice will be appreciated.
The reality of a promise is this; promises can be broken. We all need room to grow as a people. Where we can make one another happy. But in reality it is impossible to say we will not make more than 1 bad choice or 2 mistakes. Sometimes we waste time in knowing the truth. Regarding how much we allow ourselves, to either settle for one another, attempt to fix of the internal brokenness because of the fear & time it is required of in healing. Are we either try to make-up for; in what we or someone else is missing in our lives of peace & joy.
