Sex in A Child's World

This passage might be viewed as graphic. Please pardon the beginning of my salutation. I’m speaking to runways, the recipient of a trick, drug users, pill poppers and partners demonstrating unprotected, random and shared sex. I’m speaking with the adults and minors that are involved in one night stands, and promiscuous sexual encounters. Where age requirements and disease carriers little or no liability. Please listen closely.  

The reality is located in our private homes and societies where decisions and choices are being made raising concerns. About if we could have better informed our young people about sex, to avoid this next generation of pregnancies and disease, suicide and child deaths. And before anyone takes a small step and stiffed neck this happens around the globe every second of the day where a new born child is born. Into another young or adult mothers arms. And somewhere there is a possibility of dysfunction that exist involving innocence. And if the situation is not monitored by concerned engagement where people have the nerve to say "mind your own business" these children will most likely end up in grave situations. 

Hell, I understand the condition of a colored male and female, but no one talks about the reasoning to why certain things are only talked about. I understand how a culture clash is a reference to how people live in good or bad conditions. And if you have not figured out the ongoing pattern by now, continue to watch the situation grow in all cultures around the world. I can relate to feeling labeled and left behind in this world. And we have to deal with our young and older people. Who feel under pressure to perform their grown obligation, and when relationships fail to progress and dysfunction progress there is destined to be real problems. But if these types of relationships take a latter turn after the baby or babies are born; someone’s expectations did not get met so now the drama starts all over again

A child is born every second of the day to a mother ranging from 11 years old to adult age. There is a single parent woman or man who struggles to financially support their kids. And yes, I do understand there are some special situations where there is a parent who is deceased are unhealthy mentally, there are parents both struggling with an addiction if not imprisoned. There are some that are world restricted or just not time attentive. And of course there are those parents who take the child support or trust money for granted. But let’s focus on the female anatomy and what happens once a male releases his sperm and the falopian tube is disturbed. There is a 99% possibility around her ovulation date of reproducing a baby. So why is this information necessary because some of us act as if we don’t understand human anatomy, in this rapid reproductive world of babies whom continuously search for both their biological mom and dad, see how promises and those “I love you” and sex, without at least commitment. Don’t always establish long term relationships. So when a male and this female have no further interest than outside of the bed. There is another who will feel lost and damaged.

I hear females say “I’m not going to receive any assistance from him’ so what is the use in trying. And with all due respect did you not know that before the sex.

I hear males say she was a good girl. But I’m not ready to get tied down. With all due respect you should have made better choices and not with the head in between your legs.

In this entire universe any human being is capable or can choose to spread their legs. And pleasure a boy or man, girl or woman. And any human being can make promises that are meant to be for-filled if not broken, even when the words “I love you” are more than often used. And of course a young girl or woman will say “he should have not promised or said; he loves me.  Or maybe some young boy or man will say I did not tell her to open up her legs. And it’s sad to see there have been several opportunities to reprogram the incorrect way of thinking. Because being naïve at the age of making responsibilities; enables the people who continue in thinking this is not always a dam shame but a mind game. I like to play which prompt some extended families to deal with unnecessary stress if not child endangerment.

The point was always relevant over generations.  But yet the same cycle resumes between men and women, boys and girls; of no answers to why "I cannot contact you. But not every unanswered call is a sign that person does not care for his or her child. And no the biological parents are not always promised to remain together. There will be  new relationships established if not blended families.  And expect deranged emotions to start until this person deals with what is in his or her heart. But first people must stop servicing with what is between his or her legs without a commitment, responsibility of obligations, and a resolution referencing the survival and stable home for these kids that feel the burdens of being abandoned. 

Then suddenly out of blue. Over the arguing and fighting we could hear a trembling cry saying "I want my mom or daddy", which should bring tears into our grown ass lives. But some people refuse to communicate in making situations right.  So it becomes about them in this short time frame we have in this life.

Angel L-rough drafts. Now look ahead, for what's ahead. 

Sandwich Generation "game changer"

In this passage there are no charts, get rich offers, investment plan options, Wall Street gargle and Global reports. In this passage it is for all of humanity. That requires more attention and lesser ego when it comes to harvesting your individual monies. And who is waiting to accept the interest out of it.  

I’m well aware there are two classes of people in the world. And most us would like to believe we’re doing better than the rest of the world. As long as we can manage to keep up with; what is attached to our “Benjamin’s”. But not every human being has paid close attention to certain types of investors. The conservatives, moderate and high risk. And those who seek outsourced information from insider observations.

Today pick your class of shares. And in plain English it means for people to “pay closer attention” in financially and burial planning of your investments. Because making money is not complex, it’s trying to find a consistent resource out of it. So when a creditor extends you a line of credit pay closer to the fine print. Before you proceed in exhausting it on 30 years of mortgages and vacation homes, 5 to 7 years of higher car interest rates, leases on items that are only utilized when the sky’s or not blue. Or maybe you’re working to keep up with all your investments verses incoming revenue. Then every time a family member, children or friend calls with the same financial request. You will not hesitate to ask if the both of you could make the time to sit and chat regarding where you are placing this cash but never seeing a return.

This is serious in a generation where the average person does not have enough cash to survive a crisis. But some average rich person will invest more in their child’s troubled choices.  

In a single family household it’s complicated to get ahead. The pay is averaged if not less to keep up with rising inflation. And yes, there will always be sacrifices ahead regardless if you’re rich or poor. Because not everyone is willing to make a sacrifice in having lesser than more in this life. So the statistics may have a point in the reasoning to why they say children make up the worlds poverty in this life. And for every second of the day another child is born into a world where people either plan financially. Or not complete a high school or college degree. And what 's even more troubling people remain unmarried. 

Young adults continue in enjoying your life. But remember responsibilities will force you to pay the price. And one day when mommy and daddy are not around you will be misguided in your investments. By people who will not seek your best interest.  

The sandwich generation is the game changer. A mixture  breed of young and old. Where one generation lacks the interest of taking financial responsibility leaving others to accountability. So why have we not figured out how to live under one roof but instead we unload our responsibilities on others of financial securities. And know this message may never apply to you. But check down the line and figure out who is connect to whom. And rationing out or making space to accommodate all of the choices people continue to make whether it's emotionally and or financially.

Money did not make the choices in our right or wrongs. Humanity invested in “things” and “people” who would continue our legacy of financial stability or instability.   

  

I have lived a life of many struggles. I get it "time will make us accept that our children will outgrow our laps". I have seen the troubles brought into existence by humanities, choices. I have seen rewards at the same time I have witnessed it being taken for granted in life. I know hard work and still lack in provision due to assisting other people in their financial choices. I have experienced access and I've had it taken back. I have been challenged in knowledge but not taken for granted, because I sought out answers.  

We live in this sandwich generation and for most of us; we don’t realize how it has already affected us in every culture. Therefore "segregation" is no longer limited to just color. It's broader focus is seeing the “haves” or “have not” segregated into a net to catch people up in. Who do not wish to seek more of education.   

RAW

Originally I intended this passage to be about the woman and her treasured worth. So instead I’ll collaborate on more than one life topic while I place a spotlight on some of this woman’s characteristics, but before I continue with no pun intended to our transgender men and women. I will resume today in speaking to humanity about the woman who has consumed years of tears & fears, broken and abandonment, domestic abuse & incest performed by her own sex, then next a man's forced penetration. Only to be later attacked with humiliation for fighting back. This woman is a leader and strong therefore she can on stand on her own. But preferably she desires to not be alone right now in humanity that has changed all the rules where “double standards” no longer exist in male and female opposites. Why, due to the choices humanity has made so our laws changed to accommodate certain request but not in areas where there has been generations of suppression.

To all of humanism who possesses breathe and transitioning among men and women. Where on one hand were confused about our differences; equality, race, sex and of course religion. And we're quick to swear well be fine all by ourselves, but not until all men and women figure out that quick and easy is not always the way out. And yes it does matter if she slept with a friend. But why do you continue in asking for a threesome. Loneliness will drive a sane man or woman to the edge. Separation will wedge generations while waiting around for one another to figure it out; why is it so hard and long for better days to come.

In a rare situation some people are unfamiliar with; what and who is causing the conflict. In an ordinary affair people are well aware of; the tension that other people keep stirring up in the air. And by now some of my readers have figured out what these Angel L. passages have been all about. As others observing remain in doubt about someone else or themselves. And what the hell or whom is this writing about. See how being lost and bruised in the same places leaves you RAW for life, allowing temptations to rule our lives. 

A young adult ask me what “Humanism is I responded with it is real people and how we live here on earth together as men and women, created from one pattern. Giving into one another through submission, taking one another for granted or enabling each other in our dispositions. And by no way am I implying that all people are lost but some have found out; what is actually occurring live, right now. Which is humanity acting as if they don't care, people roaming around in space if not grasping for fresh air.

There are women who do love hard with all due respect. There are women who will put their hearts at stake for certain types of men; seeking all direction and shelter from a follower who has no ambition in this life. So often it comes down to thinking all women are miserable without a man, or in this new day another woman on her side or in her bed. We should probably think again. It’s because of her heartaches and disappointments that does not make a woman or girl weak. In actuality there are people in all ages of this life who are dealing with some type of low esteem, abandonment and vulnerability. So when a male of any age decides to co-mingle with a female of any age in any type of relationship, there will be always choices made and consequences to deal with. Why, because people are the cause and effect in one another’s positive or negative relationship. So don’t always assume a raw womb is the result of a physical relationship. What's occurring right now gets deeper than that. It is how people of all colors mentally interact and communicate with little or no respect. 

Men and boys of all cultures around the world. When it comes to a female she is not hard to understand in any type of relationship. All she wants is to feel safe and protected just like you want to feel appreciated, and encouraged. So once you the man is willingly to open up your hands; this woman can finally fall back, knowing you have her all of her best interest. 

Merry-Go-Round

To all my ladies and gents, let's chill and chat. It has come to a full circle that women and girls continue to seek more understanding from boys to men. So before we all begin let’s clear out attitudes and remove the egos. In order for a woman to follow this man’s lead; she and he must have their own sense “of being, if not some direction”.

I spoke with several classes of men. And finally I walked away with a better understanding of why some men prefer options, while others are making choices.  

A man has options in what he wants and only takes whatever you’re willing to give. But a man and boy will work for what is not easy to have. A man needs to be heard and not assessed. A boy seeks direction. A man needs to know that you have concrete requirements. A boy likes to experiment. A man does not require two leaders in the household. A boy needs “role models”. A man needs women to know that an ambitious man has it under, if not full control. A boy requires more time to learn, what he has yet to experience.

A man requires a partner and you may not always be on the same page. A boy requires compassion but be aware if mommie and daddy were not in the picture. Some men love to know they own or have a woman who can stand in. Some boys lack respect so you may not get it. Some men automatically assume all women are desperate and vulnerable when love is involved, and some men become too comfortable and arrogant with what is in between they’re legs. A boy will relate to what is brought to his attention; not what is never mentioned. And this is where the Merry-Goes-Round.

You can be with a man for years, live as domestic partners but never marry, while years will pass bye and the escalation of expectations will rise. Because of what has been an agreement for a period of time; an establishment which is open for options.  

A man will never make drastic or changes overnight. Men do hide their emotions inside. And there is a few who are most likely to reveal them to you. Boys and men take notes from the first approach of how a woman or girl carries her-self. And what will this woman allow to be compromised of herself.

Men do love from their hearts when it comes to performing domestics. Now pay attention too if you’re being a mother to those kids, executing domestics on que and an over-time lover in between everything. With the exception of a certain class of women who replace the sex for what they lack until this man can no longer stand it. And young girls please do not take this type of woman's approach because a boy needs more time to appreciate you down the line.

Committed men are more focused. They are seeking attributes that are similar to motherly roots. So remember we all have a weakness. And sometimes temptations are destined to make real and false accusations. 

You will never know all of a man’s truth. Unless he feels there is a grave necessity in telling you. So young girls and ladies think about it again; what it is you need to share and what are your expectations of having this man. Now process the fact; that some boys and men are capable of fulfilling what is between your trembling legs. But not all boys and men are capable of delivering emotional and spiritual connections outside of the bed, simply because men are wired different than women. And packaged with different expectations.

Angel's Examination

Sometime it’s hard. I do agree when it comes to only depending on me. So we can all agree at some point we need an examination of what we don’t or wish to see. And what I mean is sometimes our fears are hard to past. Our egos supersede to make its “all about me”. Why, because of the storms lingering into our future from our past. So more than often I take accountability to personally execute a  self-examination on myself simply to figure out; if I’m still in control of the cycle’s life will use people to take me through.    

My mind does get confused and my heart will get weary over-time. And in those days I drift far away where people fail to show respect while I work on my attitude and mindset. And what I have found in that quite space is “I can clearly hear what God has to say” and yes, I know and understand there are some people who don’t believe in God or we may not share a view on the same things were going through in life, which is fine because it only allows me the time to examine myself, situations and people in a different light.

Today I went to a place to shed some light on many things.  That I am personally dealing with in my spirit. So it does not reflect I’m angered towards the world or someone else. It’s that we must make more mature decisions in the choices we make. That often results into the domino effect. So why is it ever worth getting involved into a situation that causes lingering feelings, towards the people we love. Just to figure out; what did they do or how we keep contributing to. And again, there are these people in the entire world. Who refuse or ponder to accept why other people choose to; walk away in a cycled and dysfunctional state.

There are days I feel let down. But it does not keep me down, and the reason why; is I have allowed life to teach me many facets of people, myself & experiences" and in return, one day at a time. I am turning myself around.          –Angel L signing off.

"It takes a great man to be a good listener "
Calvin Coolidge

Erotica

There is a songstress named Betty Wright who serenaded good love in life “no pain, no gain” which excelled in informing women about certain things, but often some people may never understand the twist and turns of how being in love is “de le crème”. But also it is tagged to silly games that people will surreptitiously play. So in order to gain loves trust and respect you must be prepared to give into a few things. In order to have someone else’s love regardless of whom you choose to be with.  

The word compatibility means much more than physical attractions. Where a female and male meet, then mate before they figure out; it’s more than just sex they could have done without. So is it true a person can admire your body and love you without their entire heart. And if so, then what happens to the remainder of their soul. Well listen up young girl to an older woman’s tale. Why, because no man or woman is ever done learning valuable lessons in this world.

Sometimes there will be pain and no gain. There will be resentment if not contentment. There will be love if not infatuation in quickies or bamboozled situations. And the one thing we bargain with in ourselves is knowing how we’re guilty of wanting things or people we should not have.

It’s a new day and people are freely sharing, in every age. Generations are like a bowl of mixed nuts. Where everyone is mixing up, and dare you to share some “pain & gain” life experience. Women and girls check your attractions then later you will not have to question your actions. Young boys and men every place is not safe to lay your pants or leave deposits in.   

And it’s ok to take offense in a world filled with people who make choices, mistakes, accidents and show pure arrogance. And you think “experience” would complement, what could have been prevented of some mild mannered choices. The good news is; there are some people who have figured out, what they can live with, or whom they can’t stand to be without. In a world filled with consequences and temptations.

Do you wholeheartedly believe; that you are a pillar of strength, where you surrender to weakness. 

Addictions

 How could I forget you when every thought that could have been me and you, manages to make me feel “Misty Blue” and there were times when I deprived myself knowing that you were a pass time for everyone else. So instead we both stayed around, and continued in entertaining one another simply because I allowed you to hang around.  But for some reason I can no longer hide this pain I feel inside. And we both know that addictions destroy lives. Because it does not ponder with; whether he or she will give up or forever stay in love with this deceit in which you seek to find in attention, love, comfort and peace. If only they could disconnect from me. I would no longer possess this power over them. And where they strongly desire to be held in open arms just to feel safe and warm, but I’m afraid to allow them to have strength and reveal what makes me real. I don’t know what life has in store for me. But eventually someone will say “love is a possibility” then they will no longer believe in me.  And once they choose to no longer stand in their own way, destiny will deal with me.        

I must admit it’s been awhile since I’ve last slept. It’s been some time since love had no regrets. And yes, it’s been some generations since the truth has been revealed. All because of the addicted way people love to feel in my world where dreams are real. So how did I the “addiction” find my way into families, education, careers and society? Well no one took the appropriate time to question their own lives. If only they would have asked to themselves; why do I continue in settling for everything else? They would have known that this hidden addiction would surface soon.

They say time will heal all wounds. But in the meantime this addiction gives me a “voice and a peace of mind” it no longer feels out of place in a world of people that harbor me every day. And yes, I am your deepest desire that shows up in different attires. I am the voice of reasoning in your hardships. I am the face you are familiar with. I am in the love you desire to die for. I am carefree, ruthless, arrogant and ambitious. I am aroused by your submission. I consume all ages. I live in your conscious and all always prepared to pursue you in vulnerable places. So I need you to understand how there is always going to be some good and bad, on every hand. And while some of you pray, I'm also preying on your weakness, which is my soul mate.

Of course I’m always optimistic and pessimistic regarding your change. But the truth still remains; until you find balance in your life and not always believe that the grass is greener on the other side of life. We will deceive the other into not figuring out, what this addiction is all about. 

Developing Business Savvy

When our ancestors thirst for water & bread; man offered an opportunity to work. And on my journey through life I heard many voices to write; the days and stories of our lives. 

The business world is a module of “profit” "consumers" and “demand”, and underneath these business umbrellas you will communicate with an arena of retailers, producers, builders, developers, planners and investors. Who take alternate approaches in servicing the customer based on what is their life demand.. And how will we “transport” "market" and “sale” it to them.     

In today’s society everyone is a customer, even the face you can’t see underneath each umbrella. We all have a creative approach to closing an interview. But so does the interviewer who has already implemented their own ideas in their business module plan. So therefore any style of person will be the candidate chosen to compliment, the bottom lines of that business. And before we begin this segment, I’m not writing to discourage any human being to quit what they have invested of their life, for retirement. But what I am encouraging you to do is in; business always be open to closing.

So what happened over the years from our ancestors forwarded today, in a new world of “demand” filled with people and their business ideas? Well let’s do the math. Some businesses maintained their success rate. Some businesses still offer quality and reputable services. Some businesses were bids overnight. And some consumers did not want the responsibility, and instead continued to be “worker bees’. Some people became accustomed to a life that was comfortable in their 8-5.  Some people put their vision to the side, in an attempt to keep up with life. So they were titled the consumers, and a few still struggle to comprehend the structure of a business and relationship plan. And please do not take the wrong approach by saying “I been doing or in this business for many years. And if so the next question is; why has humanity not kept up with the “demand, quality and services”.  

There is some truth to the old cliché regarding “Money” which it will never be sufficient to humanity. Why, because of the “demands, service and quality” that will not outlast what people want and need. 

Fear is the culprit in any business transaction. And perfection is how you market it. So no matter what your service, and product, talent or creative plan is never settle for anything of lesser in doing the Business. 

CAMOUFLAGE

Before I begin I was ask the question "what type of attention do I expect to receive from my writings". I responded with a smile “not much at all”. Because what I’ve done is taken a leap of faith and chose to write factual occurrences from humanities lives. So just in case people in this life decide to change how we treat one another and execute things. There will be some history on how we once “use to be”.  

This new generation in all races and ages seem to devalue life. And what I mean is we’re playing with fire. Children are grinding as adults video tape, giggle and laugh. While some children & adults struggle to correct jumbled dialect, execute a math problem. If not spell, read and write. Some adults cohabitate in misappropriate ways. While families are being destroyed by domestic abuse overnight. Young men and girls are beaten to death by their own hands. If not taken out by the drugs slid into their trembling hands. Adults are focused about searching for love online; but quick to avoid one another in the streets with wandering eyes. Everybody wants to be rich, sexy and slick while the system is crashing. Sex is overrated but advertised everywhere we drive, eat and sit, even in church. And what I mean is people are walking alluring billboards that read “sex” is what the world needs. Mental illness, drugs and war is not a game so therefore you must not get too relaxed; on what has yet to be managed. Attending a wedding reception is by chance that two people are marrying one another for love & to progress; not just for financial security. And yes, people would love to be wealthy and rich, if not comfortable and focused. In a place where people are running tight on space and "camouflage" means; adjusting who we are on the outside, to feel good about what we have become on the inside. And no writing of Angel l is ranting and rage. This is humanities reality which brings us to:

All the time laughter is required to remind us when situations occur; how people forget to care.

Sometimes paying it forward; does not mean people will always remember to look backwards.

        

       A glass half empty does not always need to be filled to the top; until we understand the difference between a little and lot.

Sometimes being in love with the wrong people “oozes” the life out of you; but eventually time does heal all wombs.

The grass always looks greener on the opposite side. And so would yours if you would consider investing more of your time; in what is meant to grow in your life.

Sometimes it’s refreshing to see people release wasted energy.  And the reason why, is what you thought you knew, has now been revealed to you.

Sometimes fear is the only thing some people can relate to, sometimes showing happiness is all a person has to look forward too. Sometimes people are lonely not by choice, but by their own destructive personality. 

Sometimes people just like seeing what reaction they can snatch out of you. And it’s up to you in figuring out; how to build a shield around yourself and house. And once you decide to embark on living the fullest pace in this life, there will be no regrets.

At the beginning of every race each runner has a marked place. But not every runner will endure the race. Therefore, you must possess "courage" and set your pace, to step out on unknown territories.

Mother's Day

This mother's day I am grateful and happy to see my mother. But the sad news is someone has lost their mother over the years. And that broken heart still yearns to have that motherly talk. So today I will speak from the last moments that I spent with a special woman in my life, and although I have my mother. This woman is the one that bonded us together. Why, it was through her womb she decided to give my mother life.

Dear Grandma, 
I miss your chuckle and how you use to say "what's up doc" how are things going your way. I miss our prayer time on those late night calls. I miss the aroma of those homemade biscuits in my dream. I miss your aroma in the night air breeze. I miss getting dressed in our Sunday best for church services. I miss your stories and how you would make it through life. And in the end what you told me. I will "cherish" it the rest of my life. You were the link in this family’s chain. You were my strength through the night and shining armor when the enemy came. You were the voice of reasoning to get me through these troubling days. And for that I thank you for being who you are from yesterday.

Dear Mom, 
Words are not enough to express my gratitude and respect for you. And to be honest you were always my best friend, thanks to Grandma who made it happen. So a long time ago I made a vow that if I promised to be obedient; that God would allow me to see my mother, in my latter years. And yes, here she is.

Mom, the world has changed and although we speak every day. I can hear things in your voice of how the world has changed. And know it's nothing you could have done better in this life. Time was just destined to change people overtime. Children were destined to choose their own paths, families would unite in differen circumstances, and struggles would be inevitable. Because of father time who would let all of humanity know; I am, not man who is in control. See mom how our stories from the past would bring us closer together in time. Where people would grasp onto what others are unfortunate to not have, and the reason why I still shared; it was because most of my old friends lost their mothers. I wish you could still hear the laughter I once heard on every call. And those days where we just stowed away until life changed us all. Because the labor increased making people grow weary. But I'm so blessed to know that the women in my life; were gentle and peaceful, forgiving and faithful, appreciative just to love in this life. You are the extension of the woman I grew into. We were the story that was meant to be told.  I love you mom & Happy Mother’s Day!

And for those who have lost their mom think about this: child when I can no longer find peace on this earth. And you are too busy with what life will not allow you to keep up with; will you remember me when I'm old and gray. When my footsteps are short in space; will you take time to refocus on the tools I provided you, to make it through hard times? Will you remember the reason why I was there for you in this life? And if so mourn for me a little while, child because tomorrow has its own plan and I need you to be focused on where you plan on going. Why, because this place is not our permanent home. And one day I will be gone. But before I leave I left "love" in a package where you can always remember me. Now lift up your head high and wipe your eyes. There is work to be done, and we can't finish until you have completed your run.

And for those who have animosity in their hearts towards a mother. Listen closely, in order to find peace in yourself. First, you must release that hate for someone else. See my children "young" and "old" how people will make choices "good & bad". But we don't ever have to understand it. So if time allows you another day, why not look over your life and figure out; what is of worth in it, to allow you to find "forgiveness so that you may move into another day to rewrite a new chapter in your life.

Endorphin

People interpret one another through emotions and physical ways. But without the proper interaction of communication, and realm of understanding these same people who are destined to internally change, will find out how “endorphin” alleviates stimulation in our brains. The reality to why people emotionally and physically react to all things, in this life. So therefore it’s important we deal with the emotional and physical changes in ourselves. In order to accept and change what we feel “emotionally” and “physically” in dealing with everything else. Why, because what we as a people assume of our academics and street intelligence will eventually collide with the ramifications of change that is gradually occurring in real people’s life.

I knew a mother who loved all of her children, but not the same. Because of life’s journey that would bring on heartache, laughter and pain. Why, because these children were not destined to be the same; emotionally and physically only genetically. So once they grew up in age everything changed, drastically. So therefore this mother questioned if not prayed before re-examining the choices she had once made. In order for her to figure out that a man or mate should add, or could subtract from her “change” one day, simply due to choices that are “inevitable”, but they must be made.  

One day a boy looked to his mother for all the answers to why children and love is so important in a girl or woman's life. Some mothers had good responses while some did not know how to reiterate an answer. Then one day this boy thought he was prepared to be a man & created children and married a wife which groomed him rapidly into a man overnight. Learning and struggling with unanswered questions for the remainder of his life. Therefore if any female is faced with how can a male at any stage of his life, become a slave to Kush, love more than one woman at a time, or refuse to grow out of a little boys mind. Remember it was a woman who could not provide answers to this child at birth, and some man who walked away from responsibility and dismissed taking on accountability to continue in replenishing the earth with other woman nurturers looking for a foundation. So the results ended in how both parents managed to not answer this boy’s concerns; why is having children and love so important to her. 

I can now relate to why; people must feel important, respected and acknowledged in life because humanity seeks to feel a level of comfort if not validation in their own skin.  and when a person becomes insecure, fearful or uncomfortable because of the lack of being acknowledge, respected and validated.  It causes a behavioral change in their patterns.  

I have experienced a place of loneliness with people standing around, but never desperate enough to give up on me. Whether it was death or in situations where people placed clarity on what they were only willing to offer and invest to settle with me, therefore I expected to lose many.  

I spoke with a person of interest. Who said I’ve kept relationships for over 20 years. So why was our friendship not relationship so different, because this person in whom I trusted with my friendship did not reveal their “horny” physical interest. So one day our friendship was tested, due to a lack of communicating “expectations”. I immediately placed a call to see; what did I miss and is it something we can fix. The person said we’re good and my schedule is wide-open. And what I learned is after all these years of emotionally working through myself to deal with the loss of fluctuating associates, people and friends in my life. How one day was inevitable for a break in our lives. Because we never communicated in the right way, are respected one another for making a personal change. 

I understand now why so many people attempt suicide. And not I’m speaking in light of who has taken his or her own life. I’m reflecting on the “emotional and physical” decisions people make in this life.  

Recently I took a flight and without placing restrictions and limitations on my everyday arrivals and departures through life. I was destined to make a change for this flight “emotionally and physically” in order to deal with the road blocks set ahead in life, so once this stewardess accomplished accommodating a passenger in seating due to their physical weight. I had to immediately adjust emotionally in my weary space of departures and arrivals in my day. In order to accommodate a servant’s way of making this passenger sit comfortably, from their original space, a few inches away from people who did not physically accept “change” in space. Is when I immediately whispered to this person and said “these two sits were empty for one reason”, the passenger smiled and immediately I fell asleep. But not before I ask God to forgive me; for I would also be tested as a faithful servant. Then later on in the flight the same stewardess would pass me bye, in the same row I did not hear “would you like something to drink” as I close my eyes and drifted back to sleep, finding peace.    

We live in a society where people are accustomed to stir in many directions. That will challenge one another emotionally and physically, resulting in human change. That does not always take place in a cordial, natural or peaceful way.   

I hear things can be better if people work at being better to them self’s; before attempting to change someone else. I’ve experienced generational triumphs and pain. And in order for us to experience a generation of peace; we must first deal with our internal enemy.

I know what it feels like to appreciate time management while attempting to survive in poverty for more enrichment in life. I can relate to power, wealth-and contentment; because a peace of mind is priceless. But a choice will be made, in what you’re willing to forfeit of things and people you can no longer internally process or change.

Do we not know how the wealthiest man is a servant to his or her own inheritance? Do we not identify with how we all must labor in this life and not only for profit? Do we all not identify with; if we continue to resist the Endorphin in our brains, we continue to lose track of managing our “time” in which we relinquish over time.   

 We live in candied society where people are accustomed to act out the extreme, if not process thinking. And we have witnessed humanity perform “Temper Tantrums” like the ones in babies. So what I mean is we are quick to judge before judging ourselves, we are to contagious to stress then wonder why is it mess. We are quick to lie and blame it on someone else. We quick to be angered then implement religion in our own devilish acts, so that we can honestly live with; we’re much better than the next person.

A blue print plan is something in our wiring not created by man. But yet some of us choose man over religion. Therefore we’re all destined to take paths, but for some of us we are going to be routed in opposite directions.

I have not always reached the height of perfection in my life. I have not always accommodated man's or woman's expectations. I have not always agreed with my family, but I will continue in loving them dearly. And I have figured out "myself', how people in time revolve in silence and act out loud. Life will not allow us the time to get people up to speed, about our life. Just be open when “sincere” people show up a chance in a lifetime.  

-Angel L signing off, once I decided to Jump!